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My husband is an engineer and a lecturer and I am federal government worker with three kids(two boys and one girl). My husband is 43,and I am 38. This is 11 years old marriage and legally both tradition and white wedding but we are from different states. My father in-law and mother in-law are both alive.They have 9 children including my husband as the first, three girls and 6 boys. They do things in their family without my knowledge. Nobody carries me along. They call me when they need money. My husband includes me when he knows he cannot afford to give them. The sisters ins*ult me anyhow including their mother. The family us3 my husband as a rag. if I talk my MIL (mother in law ) will sparkk like fiire. presently, my husband is training his three siblings in the University. Two have graduated, trained by him. He does not feed us well except if i do. presently, our house rent has expired and he said he does not have cash to pay.

Imagine the bul$hit! But he is paying achool fees and house rent for his siblings. Because he rented an apartment for them outside the campus. If I did not pay school fees nor house rent, he will not pay. I mentioned it to his mum and the woman told me to use my money and pay. That they suff.ered to train my husband in the University. It Is his turn to train his siblings now. That I should not complain. Always borrowing money to take care of his family. He went and opened cement business in the village without my knowledge and the business did not last for one year. I later realized that my MIL told him not to tell me. I bought a land 4M and he had refused to help me develop that land til today rather he told me to be patient till he finished training his siblings in d university. He drives my car around without fueling it.

He wears non.sense clothes around. Sometime I will be asham3d of myself. This will make me to shop some good wears for him. But for how long? He prefers to protect his family and siblings than me and my children. One of his sisters was impr3gnanted by one of our security guards, a student too. Do u know that up til today, no body told me about it including my husband. I heard it outside and I pretended that I did not hear. Sir this is the height of it. My husband bought a bike for his brother without my knowledge until he had an acciident with it. All the family call my husband every day but no body call me , ask of my kids. Are they using him or what? Can this be charm? who will help me? And I don’t hear their language that is the worst of it. Even my kids call him a wic.ked father but I will tell them to keep quite. They are 10, 8 and 6. If I travel for official assignment, they will cry because of the ill trea.tment of their father. He does not take care of them nor do their assignments. A lecturer for that matter. He wears one boxers from January to December except if i replace them. Why are they wic.ked to me including my husband?

The family does not use eyes to see my family including my husband. This is Four years now he does not call my people. My dad di.ed four years ago and my husband did not contribute one naira for his funeral. For how long will i cover up that all is well? I want to secretly seek to transfer to my state and run away with my kids without him knowing.

I am tir3d of the situation. Pls advise me

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What can one do in this type of situation??

Is this marriage or bondage??

And where is the mistake coming from?

For matured minds please